What are common commodities that need to be protected? Wealth, jewelry, art, homes, fancy cars, precious instruments, car titles, passports. All of these things, though special and often priceless, can be insured and secured with guards, locks, or vaults. So what about time, love, desire, thought, ideas, and integrity? How are those items, er concepts, secured and protected?
In a roundabout way, I’ve had the misfortune of interacting with a vampire recently. A vampire? Like Dracula? Like Edward? No, a mere mortal vampire, someone who sucks the life-force out of me, someone who omits truths (I think that’s really called lying), someone who takes things without asking (stealing is the modern word), and recalibrates stories to fit with their program (manipulation). As disarming as all of this is, the worst part is that my time has been wasted and my trust in humanity has waned. One of these vampires is not someone I’ve met in person; rather I’ve had unfortunate dealings in removed, six-degrees-of-Kevin-Bacon sorts of ways.
A true existentialist, I believe that life is short and I must be protective of my values and time. So what do I do with these vampires who usurp my energy, who waste my time, who treat me like prey? I don’t eat garlic, but I do briefly consider the motives and then MOVE ON. I look at my role and MOVE ON.
So how do love and integrity fit in? Well, sometimes people say they’re loving but their actions are incongruous with their words. I think love is the most important feeling, thing, behavior, concept in the world. Mixed with integrity, it’s so powerful and attractive. But when I’m prey, I lose hope that there is really enough love and integrity to go around. I worry that I’ve missed my chance or that someone else has been bitten by the vampire fangs and he’s doomed before we have a chance to progress. Or what if someone comes back into my life and he’s already gone to the underworld? Is there enough sunlight to eradicate the demons?
My Hebrew name means light. It’s no coincidence that I’m tasked with shining light on the vampire and killing it with my goodness and removing it (and all associations) from my life. I used to be paranoid that I was being followed or stalked, but now give it no brain power. Instead, I light extra candles, laugh more, enjoy the warmth and integrity of my unicorn and good gnome friends! Together we are a stronger army than the energy vampires who’ve crossed my path!
Our collective light is part of the time and love that I protect so dearly. I value lessons I’ve learned and DO NOT WANT TO REPEAT THE MISTAKES! I light my path with luminarios of goodness, floodlights to keep me safe.
I still don’t know how to keep vampires from circling my world (emergency garlic packs?!), but I’m learning how to shield myself from their disastrous entrance. I know not to give them any attention, not to acknowledge their seedy ways, not to empathize with their manipulative plights. I have to stay on my well-carved path and keep my focus on lighting the way for myself and others who have felt this decrepit and insidious pull. My friends help me, and I help myself. I must remember that my life, including my time, my love, my passions, my integrity are my most valuable commodities and must be held sacred.
Vampires are here to challenge me. I resolve to be stronger than their bites and keep my values protected.
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7 thoughts on “Vampires”
It’s so true, Nina. All you can do with a bad relationship (romantic or otherwise) is look at your role in it, and then just move on. People don’t change unless they really want to. so sometimes I think you just have to accept it and move along with your own life and goals.
Looking at my role can be quite confronting, necessary, and difficult. But overall better than staying angry.
I wholeheartedly admire you for writing about this topic. It seems you are much wiser and much more in tune after being bitten by these energy vampires.
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